F here, hoping not to jinx this, and hoping it is not just my week off talking, but i may be beginning to see the light.... things now just seem like A LOT of work rather than containing some ulterior motive or some hidden trick. next semester looks daunting but not as bad as i thought at the beginning... at least i am not in the 8:20 am class! yay! i am actually looking forward to a time when i can choose my own classes (all of them!!!) and can drop a class or prof that i don't like. hey, that i am even thinking i will survive until then sounds like progress... too bad it has taken 2 months and required this much effort on my part to come to this realization... perhaps this is not so bad... i have learned about what i DO NOT want, who i might want to be and what i DO NOT want to be and maybe even what i DO NOT have to do to myself to get there :) maybe stew-ball was right... maybe i do have a good outlook about this and will keep it from taking me over... at least i will try
here i go again into the great unknown.....
